AaaaaaaCHEWwwwwwww!!!!!!!

So here it is, one day into the Fall season and I have already been hit with the 'Mac truck' of the 'Cough, Cold, & Flu' season!...Just my luck!!!

My throat is sore and scratchy, my nose is running like a siv, my eyes are watering and I can't stop sneezing.  I am the first 'victim' of the house this season and hoping the cycle will end with me!

I guess one of the 'advantages' to being sick is the sympathy one receives from those around whom are required by obligation to show compassion...hint hint!!..:-)...Also, the forgoing of any regular expectation of the ailed wife, mother, employee...the allowance to rest and rejuvenate ones person back to health.

Today worked out perfect for the 'employee' side of things...my work gave us today off due to lack of work...fine by me!!!

I have sat here on my computer for most the morning catching up with family and friends, drinking my tea and water and dutifully taking some meds to help lessen the 'flu-like' symptoms.

But, even as I sit here, tissues on hand and 'Halls' ready to go...I still feel a sense of guilt...that kind of guilt that only a wife can relate to...we are not supposed to get sick!!!...We, the 'home runners' cannot afford even a short 'glitch' in our busy and hectic schedules!!  Even though I am not required to work today by my employer...that does not take away the fact that my laundry needs washed, my bathroom needs cleaned... amongst a list of other household responsibilities yet to be completed!

What's worse, is I had purchased tickets three months ago to go and see one of my favorite bands "Hedley"  right here in my home town!  They played right here in Oshawa at the GM Centre last night.  But, due to my sickness I decided to sell them.  I'm ecstatic for my niece though..I'm sure she enjoyed it a million times more than I would have!!...Love you Jaden..Hope you had a BLAST!!!

I will end this note with a tribute to 'Hedley'...this is one of my favorite songs by them...maybe one day I will see them play it in concert! :-)

Transition...

This past weekend my husband's family and I gathered to say 'good-bye' to Summer and together bring in this new season of Fall.  Most of you may dread this transition, where I welcome it with open arms!

Summer has many highlights unique to itself, in no other season are we able to enjoy outdoor swimming, attend family bbq's or bonfires, work in our gardens, or even drive with all of our windows down, sunroof or convertible open.  I, just as the next person do tend to miss these small privileges that Summer does tend to lend itself to.  However, I will explain to you why I much prefer Fall, 'Summer's vastly underestimated counterpart'.

The Fall season reminds me of a snake shedding it's old skin...just as the green leaves turn red, orange & gold and the weather turns from hot & sunny to cool & crisp...these are only a few of the transitions we experience.  Vacations are over, children are back to school, parents are back to their regular routines.  It's in this season that we trade our t-shirts & sandals for our fleece jammies, slippers & hoodys.  

We focus on paying off any outstanding summer debt to prepare for this season's lingering whisper and promise...'Christmas'.

But, before I get ahead of myself, we also plan and look forward to the big family feast of Fall... 'Thanksgiving'...which family member will host it this year?, who to invite?, which dishes to prepare?, which decorations we will use?...This all adds to the wonder and excitement of this season.

The transition from Summer to Fall also brings about daylight savings...at least we get an extra hour of sleep! :-)

Some of my favourite things about Fall are the colourful leaves, cool weather & fresh air, Thanksgiving get-togethers & of course the meal!  

 

Like any other transition, Summer fading to Fall does bring about change.  But change isn't always a bad thing.  For example, I anticipate the change of television programming, I willingly trade the incessant growing grass & dandelions to the dormant grass & the beautiful array of scattered leaves.  I look forward to the cool evenings that my husband and I cuddle together under a blanket watching movies and sipping on our hot beverages of choice!  Trips to the pumpkin farm..the hay rides, horse rides, hot apple cider and pumpkin carving.

One of the more unique attributes to this season and the one that I value the most is the expectation to think about and reflect upon what we have in our lives to be thankful about...whether or not it's shared around the dinner table this season I challenge you, if you are reading this today  take a few moments to contemplate what in your life you are most thankful for?...I will do the same...but that's another post for another day!

To Be Continued...

Whitewash...

How come when a girl is young she dreams of knights in shinning armour, rose petals and white picket fences?  Who puts these aspirations in place?  Can this be solely blamed on 'media'?   Are these things to be attributed to wedded bliss?...to a source of deep happiness or a sense of great satisfaction with life?

Or, are these only dreams, fantasies that we all think about but never believe will ever actually come true?..If this is the case..wouldn't it be at least arguable that we, ourselves are setting up our own source of disappointments?..Our own sense of false hope?

Or, are these 'fantasies' linked to something bigger...maybe an expectation, a belief or a dream like a penny tossed into the wishing well of life for the future?

What happens when you wake up 'x' amount of years later to find that your 'knight in shining armour' is nothing more than just the man you married wrapped in tin foil, your rose petals have all dried up and your white picket fence is now faded and in disrepair?

Do we fight against the changes and try to get our life back to the way it was?...Or do we embrace the changes by squinting so your husband in tin foil still appears to be your knight, use the dried up petals for potpourri, and whitewash the fence?

I believe we have all come to this 'cross-road' in our lives.  At one point or another whether we are married, single, widowed or divorced..there has been a fork in the road of our lives that has prompted us to choose a path or direction.

Today, I feel that I am headed towards one of those 'forks'.  I feel tired, hurt, disappointed, drained, unappreciated and completely overwhelmed with life..more specifically with my 'knight'.

Before I continue, I think it is only fair that we take a look at the actual definition of a 'knight'. As provided by www.Dictionary.com:

* a man, usually of noble birth,who after an apprenticeship as page and squire was raised to an honorable military rank and bound to chivalrous conduct.*


I don't know about the rest of the husbands out there, but mine was not of noble birth, he was never a page nor was he a squire.  He was definitely not raised to any honorable military rank and was never bound to chivalrous conduct.


So, where does this leave me?...Yep...just the man I married wrapped in the tin foil that I bought,  paid for, and wrapped him in all on my own.  More specifically...just an unsuspecting mortal man of earthly morals whom vowed to love, honor and cherish me until death.  Not once did he promise or vow that he would hold or maintain 'knight-like' virtues....So why do I have it so ingrained into my mind to expect such cavalier qualities from him? 


This question I cannot answer for myself.  Maybe I can blame it on the media, more specifically 'Disney' for creating such movies as 'Cinderella' for young girls to watch and dream about.  Maybe I can blame it on old bedtime story books or maybe even on singer/songwriters who portray that love should be a 'Bed of Roses'?


In any case, I am sitting here now trying to figure out where to go from here.  When you've already said everything, tried everything, did everything you can and it just doesn't seem to be enough.


If you are wondering what my 'cross-road' looks like right now I can give you a bit of a glimpse.


I work full time in a physically demanding job in a factory, when I get home, despite being totally and utterly drained: I do the laundry, the floors, the bathrooms, the bedding, the dishes..(you know)..the 'wifely' things...once these are all completed, if hubby is home, he is hungry...and on a night like tonight - he wants me to take 'my turn' to cook!  What about him taking a 'turn' with the housework???


I know that most people will tell me that things should be 50/50 and that he should do 'his' part...ya...don't preach to the choir!  Of course I agree with that...I believe that 100%...but it doesn't make a bit of blinding difference if my 'knight' doesn't share in that belief!!


So here I sit, contemplating how to make the best of what I have, 'buck up' and move on...


Should I only concentrate on his 'good', more pleasurable traits (of which he has many) and work on blinding myself to the ones that irritate me?  Or should I stand strong in my insolence and go to battle with my own 'knight'?? 

I think I am going to take the path of least resistance.  Instead of 'battling' (which hasn't gotten me any further ahead anyway) I will choose to love him...I will strive to see past his annoying inadequates and try to focus on everything I love about him...all the reasons I married him and all the reasons I'm still married to him!  Yes it's true, I don't think I will ever find total resolve with this issue, I think it will probably always be a thorn in my 'Bed of Roses',  but...for today I will lay this issue to rest. 

Summer Family Fun...

For those of you whom know me very well, you may be wondering just exactly what has happened to the 'Beckarazzi' this summer!?!?....Truthfully, this summer has not been a very noteworthy one; not much for me to take photos of...and when the mood did strike me, I very seldom had my camera...(I know...SHOCKING!!!!)...I will let you take a moment to digest some that 'shock'.....

Here are a few shots of our recent family fun day at Cedar Park!

Anytime I gather with family is an awesome time in my books!!...This particular day at the water park turned out to be pretty special...Kevin, Maddy and I had planned for a family fun day...unbeknown to us...my sister also had planned to come with her family and surprise us :-)...So it truly was a day filled with family fun!!!

Birthday Wishes...

I would like to extend a Happy Birthday greeting to my big sister Tanya!!!...I sincerly hope that you enjoyed a day as special as you are :-)

Sister, we've been there through life's sorrow and pain
But together we have always endured the strain
We've argued and bickered and made each other mad
But if you weren't my sister, life would be so sad
We've cried till we laughed and laughed till we cried
Sometimes for no reason we didn't even know why
When we're not together our bond is just as strong
Because we are sisters we know when something is wrong

We've whispered our deepest secrets only sisters could share
I love my sister dearly because she really cares
So whether we are together or we are far apart
Tanya, you're my sister, my friend and forever in my heart.

'The Last Song'

Tonight, I finally got to watch a movie which I have been wanting to see since I saw the previews before it hit theatres. After seeing it, I have to say that my anticipation was not sold short or in vain. I found the movie to be a total 'tear jerker' a deffinite MUST SEE!!!

This movie, 'The Last Song' is about a Seventeen-year-old Veronica 'Ronnie' Miller's life was turned upside-down when her parents divorced and her father moved from New York City to Tybee Island, Georgia.

Three years later, she remains angry and alienated from her parents, especially her father ...until her mother decides it would be in everyone's best interest if she spent the summer on Tybee Island with him.

Ronnie's father, a former concert pianist and teacher, is living a quiet life in the beach town, immersed in creating a work of art that will become the centerpiece of a local church. The tale that unfolds is an unforgettable story about love in its myriad forms - first love, the love between parents and children - that demonstrates, as only a Nicholas Sparks novel can, the many ways that deeply felt relationships can break our hearts ...and heal them.

Dogs Can Be Heros Too!

Reflections...

Occasionally, events will occur in our lives that cause us to stop so that we may reflect and re-evaluate all that which comprises the many facets of our life. These periods cause us to reprioritize things, abandon what does not belong or is making our lives more difficult and stressful, and seek out what truly matters to us. The last couple of months have been such a time in my life. There was no significant 'event' which brought about this time of 'reflection' for me; just a feeling of emptiness; an unexplainable void in my life, which I have just recently found to be a longing for something I had long abandoned. God!

As a child I was raised in a home where God's love was not only preached, but shown with great efforts from both my parents. They raised us with strong Christian morals and values to no avail. What I didn't know or didn't appreciate back then was that being a 'Christian' has less to do with going to church and memorizing Bible verses and more to do with how we love others, how we treat other people. I didn't know or understand that the meaning of 'Christian' is to be 'Christ-like'. I can't say that my current life reflects that very well either, but at least now I am aware...and as they say, that's half the battle...

You may be asking yourself right now, "How does one become 'Christ-like'?" I will only answer with what I believe to be true; if you want to become like someone...you have to know that someone. 'How does one become to 'know' God?' you may ask...well the answer to that is quite simple...read his word!! I heard once that the Bible is God's love letter to us, it's filled with daily words of comfort, encouragement, hope, inspiration, and guidance...a direction manual for life, if you will!

Now before I am flamed as a 'Bible thumper' or any such thing I have to be honest...I am not a Christian, or at least I haven't been living as one for most my life. I am one of those people who has always admitted to 'believing in God' but that was about as far as my faith had matured. I now realize that just 'believing' gets you no where...even Satan 'believes' in God!!

So now you may be wondering what I am doing with this new found appreciation for my faith?, where has it taken me?, what have I learned?, and what does this mean for my life?

When I have all of those questions answered for myself...I will gladly share them!!!

But for now I will leave you with this....